Question

Can someone pls edit or give feedback for the intro of my essay about the poem "Kindness" by Naomi Shihab Nye????

Intro:
A variety of poetic devices are utilized in Naomi Shihab Nye’s poem, “Kindness,” such as repetition, personification, and alliteration. Repetition is the use of the same word or phrase multiple times. Personification is when an abstract or a non human form is described as if it were human. Alliteration is the repetition of an initial consonant sound in words that are in close proximity to each other. The poem explains that someone must experience sorrow, grief, or loss in order to understand kindness. Throughout the poem, the author dives into the origins of kindness and unveils the harsh truth behind it. She explains that someone must lose everything that they took precautions to save, in order to understand how bleak life can be due to the absence of kindness. By having experience of losing someone or something, it will be more comprehensible that kindness has the strength to lift someone up and prevent them from shattering from the heaviness of grief. The author uses an assortment of poetic devices in the poem in order to portray that kindness can completely turn someone’s life around. She writes in a very personalized style that touches on memories of her home, childhood, and travels. Her style strengthens her poetry since she has had actual experience with what she’s writing on, so she possesses expertise on her topics. As a contemporary poet, she prefers to write in an unconventional manner, using free verse and challenging structure. This allows her to have a broader expression of herself through her writing. In the poem, she focuses on the roots of kindness to teach the readers that they need to accept the bad in order to achieve the good by utilizing an array of poetic devices as a contemporary poet, where her childhood and travel memories inspire her style.

Answer 1

Overall, the text provides a good summary of the main points about Naomi Shihab Nye's poem "Kindness," but there are some areas where it could be improved. Here are some feedback and suggestions:

Provide more specific examples of poetic devices: While the text lists some poetic devices used in the poem, it would be helpful to provide specific examples to illustrate them. For instance, instead of simply defining repetition, the author could provide a quote from the poem that demonstrates its use.

Use more varied sentence structures: The text is written in a relatively straightforward style, which can make it sound a bit repetitive. To improve the flow and readability, the author could vary sentence structures and add more transitional phrases to connect ideas.

Provide more analysis and interpretation: While the text describes the themes and style of the poem, it could benefit from more in-depth analysis and interpretation. For instance, the author could explore why the poet chose to use a particular device in a certain part of the poem, or what effect it has on the reader.

Proofread for grammar and style: There are a few areas in the text where the grammar or syntax could be improved. For example, the sentence "By having experience of losing someone or something, it will be more comprehensible that kindness has the strength to lift someone up" could be revised to "By experiencing loss, one can better understand how kindness can lift someone up."

Overall, the text provides a good overview of the poem, but could be improved with more specific examples, varied sentence structures, deeper analysis, and careful proofreading.