Question

Dylan wrote the following sentence for his research paper on giraffes:

The wide Savannah is roamed by tall, graceful giraffes.

His teacher told him to revise this sentence so that it is more appropriate for formal writing. Explain to Dylan how to revise the sentence.

Answer 1

Dylan needs to revise the sentence and change words like "is" to "was" to make it more interesting and more formal. Also change plain pronouns to more dramatic words. For example, After changing the sentence it would end up like this: The massive Savannah was roamed by huge, graceful giraffes.

Answer 2

The wide savannah was roamed by tall, graceful giraffes. sorry I get it right if wrong

Step-by-step explanation: