Question

Revise for constructive tone How do you think the following memo will make the recipients feel? How would you re- vise the following memo to more constructively address the problem? From: Ann Onymous To: All Employees Date: Feb. 3, 2011 Subject: Littering For some time now, smoking has been strictly prohibited within five metres of the Main Building entrance. Do NOT smoke anywhere near the doors! Some of you still insist on smoking and have been doing so inside this area. As a result, the areas near the rear exit and around the picnic tables are constantly littered with smoking-related debris (filter tips, half-smoked cigarettes, empty lighters, etc.), creating an eyesore and making more work for my staff, who have to keep cleaning up this mess. Starting Monday, sand buckets will be provided outside the read doors and in the picnic area. Use them!

Answer 1

The following memo may make the recipients feel unappreciated, scolded, and belittled due to the boss's use of authoritative language. The following memo could be rephrased in a more constructive tone as shown below:From: Ann OnymousTo: All EmployeesDate: Feb. 3, 2011Subject: LitteringDear All Employees,As you all know, smoking has been strictly prohibited within five meters of the Main Building entrance. Nonetheless, some employees still insist on smoking near the doors, which results in the areas near the rear exit and picnic tables being littered with smoking-related debris (filter tips, half-smoked cigarettes, empty lighters, etc.). As a consequence, our cleaning staff has to work extra hard to keep up with this litter, which is both an eyesore and a public health issue.To assist with this issue, we will begin providing sand buckets outside the rear doors and picnic area, starting on Monday. We urge you to make use of these sand buckets to help keep the environment clean for all employees. Thank you for your cooperation and understanding on this matter. Sincerely,Ann OnymousThis tone is more constructive than the first memo as it is more polite and urges the employees to cooperate to help keep the environment clean. It avoids being condescending and scolding and instead promotes a more friendly and approachable work environment.